Hallen der Zeit
Verfasst: 29. Mär 2022, 01:33
Moinsen. Zunächst hatte ich überlegt, nochmal auf deutsch zu schreiben, um andere Ebenen abzudecken, und auch um der Sprache des Forums zu entsprechen. Aber ich werde ohnehin noch auf verschiedene Weisen darauf herumkauen. Mittlerweile leben wir nunmal in einer globalisierten Welt, da ist das bestimmt in Ordnung so. Es ist auch kein hohes Englisch, also vermute ich, dass die meisten, die Interesse haben, ganz gut durchkommen. Viel Spaß.
17. April
(Vielleicht) Letztes Edit: um das so zu benennen: erst als ich draußen war, war das Doomige weg. Ich war überwältigt davon, wie heftig der Straßenverkehr direkt vor meiner Haustür abgeht. Ich war gewissermaßen drauf und dran einfach per Anhalter abzudackeln. xD Eine kleine 'insel', wo man gefälligst zu warten hat, wenn Autos vorbeirushen, war auch mein Zufluchtsort. Im normalen Leben hätte ich diesem kleinen Flecken Rasen und Blumen niemals so viel Aufmerksamkeit gewidmet. Und viele Spaziergänger und Fahrradfahrer. Ich hatte nur ein tanktop, Hose und Unterhose an. Ich war schon am klappern, aber das bockte sich. DIe ganzen Leute waren viel besser gekleidet als ich mit Schals und Jacken und Handschuhen und Socken und Schuhen. Die Vögel flogen im Himmel. Die fremden Leute machten sich Sorgen um mich. Kinder gingen zur Schule, Frauen mit Kinderwagen. Ich hatte das Gefühl, dass mega viel und die ganze Zeit geraucht wird. Überall Coronamasken. Ein Vanfahrer hielt an und erkundigte sich nach meinem Befinden. Sein Gesicht kam mir seltsam vertraut vor, es vereinte für mich mehrere bekannte Gesichter und war doch ein fremdes. Ich griff einfach mit meinen Armen durch das Fenster in den space seines Van, wie als wenn ich den Raum begreifen wollte, während ich ihn begeistert in die Augen sah und dabei "whhooaa" sagte . Der muss sich gedacht haben, was ist das denn für einer. Dann ist der natürlich abgedampft. Schließlich wurde ich von den Bullen wieder reingelotst. Ich hatte das Gefühl das einer von denen auf irgendetwas drauf war, irgendein Upper. Also ich bekam die Strahlen der Sonne noch nicht mal direkt ab, das war wirklich nur die Morgendämmerung, bzw. wurden die Strahlen von der Häuserwand abgeschirmt. Puh, ob man mich jetzt etwa drankriegt? Aber ich finde dieser Part ist wichtig für das (bessere) Verständnis der Erfahrung. Mit dem, dass ich für hours resten konnte, meine ich schlicht, dass, als ich wieder oben war, ich erstmal runterkommen musste und ein paar Stunden pennen konnte.
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Im curios about how I define categories in terms of putting parameters into words. I could write for hours, but I dont want to write for hours, only order things and let you give the possibilty to partake on what can happen if one does shrooms (and so forth and so on), for science of course.
So, yesterday was a very good day, I stood up early in the morning, and was buisy in a positive way. Ate just some raw pear and carrot, then I would go for a walk for hours. The sun was there and so forth. It went evening and I had the idea of doing mushrooms. Last time I did mushrooms almost 3 months back then. There I made a tea of 1,6 gram from the same batch but withouth any enhancers. Just the plain tea which tasted strong and not very good. That experience was a little bit filthy, too, but the current experience was way more intense.
So, heres the current currant-citric-acid-1,2-gram-Cubensis-experience. The 1,2 gram I aimed at for a while now, because I have 3 gram left from that batch. So, was my plan, the next time I would aim for the same procedere just with the left 1,8 gram, which Im not that sure about anymore. When I came back home I thought forth and back but there was a unexpected strong desire to do it. The rhythms seemed fine for that. I think, the forum forced me somehow to do it, too. The last days I especially tried to handle my relationship to the world in another ways and it was refreshing. That means: dont staring at monitors. Instead of that interact with the world like folks did some years ago. I wanted to eat something. So I ate a little bit more carrot and a little bit salad midday. In the early evening I ate a tiny amount of strong cacao chocolate. I used the laptop only a little bit and then disconnected from electricity, put off the internet router. I waited, yes, meditated and stretched until almost 4 a.m., then I finally had ingested the tea. One hour before that I drank more than 300 ml of the 100 % currant juice. Or it was rather so: I wanted to smell the juice first. I first checked how long this can stay fresh. The juice stays fresh approximately 5 days in the fridge. So I just opened the bottle. Then I wanted to nip from the bottle. Then came a sip and another and another. There was still plenty left in the bottle. I thought, I could drink the rest in some days, but finally I had drank it empty slow and steady. The hour didnt felt like waiting, one hour later I had the mushroom tea in front of my nose. I prepared a can of seabuckthorn and let it stood 10 minutes, so that an initial brew temperature of approximately 80°C was there, and then poured over the mushrooms with slightly more than 2 gram citric acid. I had the moment of respect for the 1,2 gram, so I almost only did 0,9. But then I wanted to know what happens, when I do, what I aimed for. The relatively many shriveled mushrooms (because so tiny) gave their taste to the tea for sure and gave it a spicy touch in a good manner. I wanted to combine mushrooms with honey for the first time in my life. So, when the tea cooled down while drinking it, I added less then a half tea spoon to it. This was a tasty drink!
_____First i was standing. Then sitting. Then lying in the relative darkness. It doesnt came promptly. After a while I was thinking of many things in a trippy way. In a filthy/not beautiful way (but not only of course). I wasnt able to lay much time, it was very uncomfortable. I thought of my mattress in a very filthy/not beatiful way. Plus, I layed on my side, and somehow I visualised (in a rather normal way though) my bent spine, and this was uncomfortable, too. So I stood up after a rather short time. One petri dish I had looked up yesterday was so invaded by an unwanted not cube myc, that the mycelial threads with tiny black heads grew out of the edge already. That came to my mind for example and I wanted to know whats going on while tripping, where I am standing in life and what its all about. Of course I have more questions than before. Air and so forth. But I had respect to this lifeform in a positive way, too. What am I doing here? Am I capable of handling life, navigate through it? Whats right and whats not. Top and bottom, where is which direction?
_____The mushroom experience before the 1,6 gram plain tea was in october last year, where I ate 1 gram of the same batch but drank a Peganum harmala tea before ingesting them. I wrote the report in German and gave it no title, but now I choosed a title in other parameters for the first time, not just the ingredients I took, instead of that a thematic title. But the hall of time experience was there in october, too, but in another ways of course. Is anything of importance? Or doesnt it matter what happens? But somehow it matters. Should I just go and go (or walk and walk, dont know how to put it better in english) and see where I will be stranded? What is better, rolling the dice, do what one aims for or not doing anything at all. Well, we are creatures that do things. While I was going for a walk yesterday, I had the desire to pee in the bush, which I do like more than peeing into a toilet. While on the influence of the brew, that popped up again. While I was doing some steps through some gras and flowers, I thought, that it is okay, that I am manifesting this path, like a bear would. I had a feeling of guilt for the plants and potential insects, that I had set food on. Life is blooming like crazy. Someone said, that one just can go into the green, that its our choice what happens. Water. Plastic. Am I doomed to be interwoven with plastic? Will I be able to see any family member or friend again or is it all over and Im stuck into a matrix? Am I following a devilish path? Suffocating. Should I just stand right here and right now, until the end of time somehow, turning into a tree (yes, into a mushroom too, but the tree thing was stronger)? Or lying or whatever. Is everything a dream? Absurd strange anatomy. I looked on my plants in my apartment and the vegetating appeared very doomish. The music from Starbound was playing in my head so very hard and consistently and complex. It was very emotional. At one point I came into a pixel/building world like Starbound for some seconds. But the music was there so penetrating and lasting, even days after the experience. At another point I experienced somewhat debts floating through me in a depleting way (with a small amount of the opposite: refreshing energizing).
_____I had the desire to do things, that are physical impossible, with the sense that I actually cant (fluctuation). I came into a strong fantasy world of parkouring (which what I was actually doing a little bit on railings, which was refreshing for the balance and the physical movement was refreshing, too). I did it when I was younger, but very amateurish. The human body is capable to do astonishing things. Dangerous things, too. Yes, I played with the idea of jumping out of the window from the x-floor to look what happens. Does it matter? Yes, it matters. It has influence in the world. I could be dead right now, but I am living. But somehow, no matter what happens, it goes on and on. I was outside where the sun came out and it was beautiful, although I had the sense, that the twilight was going on almost forever. There were really holy moments. I dont looked on the clock, but it went pretty long, and besides the stress I had the possibility to rest for hours.
17. April
(Vielleicht) Letztes Edit: um das so zu benennen: erst als ich draußen war, war das Doomige weg. Ich war überwältigt davon, wie heftig der Straßenverkehr direkt vor meiner Haustür abgeht. Ich war gewissermaßen drauf und dran einfach per Anhalter abzudackeln. xD Eine kleine 'insel', wo man gefälligst zu warten hat, wenn Autos vorbeirushen, war auch mein Zufluchtsort. Im normalen Leben hätte ich diesem kleinen Flecken Rasen und Blumen niemals so viel Aufmerksamkeit gewidmet. Und viele Spaziergänger und Fahrradfahrer. Ich hatte nur ein tanktop, Hose und Unterhose an. Ich war schon am klappern, aber das bockte sich. DIe ganzen Leute waren viel besser gekleidet als ich mit Schals und Jacken und Handschuhen und Socken und Schuhen. Die Vögel flogen im Himmel. Die fremden Leute machten sich Sorgen um mich. Kinder gingen zur Schule, Frauen mit Kinderwagen. Ich hatte das Gefühl, dass mega viel und die ganze Zeit geraucht wird. Überall Coronamasken. Ein Vanfahrer hielt an und erkundigte sich nach meinem Befinden. Sein Gesicht kam mir seltsam vertraut vor, es vereinte für mich mehrere bekannte Gesichter und war doch ein fremdes. Ich griff einfach mit meinen Armen durch das Fenster in den space seines Van, wie als wenn ich den Raum begreifen wollte, während ich ihn begeistert in die Augen sah und dabei "whhooaa" sagte . Der muss sich gedacht haben, was ist das denn für einer. Dann ist der natürlich abgedampft. Schließlich wurde ich von den Bullen wieder reingelotst. Ich hatte das Gefühl das einer von denen auf irgendetwas drauf war, irgendein Upper. Also ich bekam die Strahlen der Sonne noch nicht mal direkt ab, das war wirklich nur die Morgendämmerung, bzw. wurden die Strahlen von der Häuserwand abgeschirmt. Puh, ob man mich jetzt etwa drankriegt? Aber ich finde dieser Part ist wichtig für das (bessere) Verständnis der Erfahrung. Mit dem, dass ich für hours resten konnte, meine ich schlicht, dass, als ich wieder oben war, ich erstmal runterkommen musste und ein paar Stunden pennen konnte.
-
Im curios about how I define categories in terms of putting parameters into words. I could write for hours, but I dont want to write for hours, only order things and let you give the possibilty to partake on what can happen if one does shrooms (and so forth and so on), for science of course.
So, yesterday was a very good day, I stood up early in the morning, and was buisy in a positive way. Ate just some raw pear and carrot, then I would go for a walk for hours. The sun was there and so forth. It went evening and I had the idea of doing mushrooms. Last time I did mushrooms almost 3 months back then. There I made a tea of 1,6 gram from the same batch but withouth any enhancers. Just the plain tea which tasted strong and not very good. That experience was a little bit filthy, too, but the current experience was way more intense.
So, heres the current currant-citric-acid-1,2-gram-Cubensis-experience. The 1,2 gram I aimed at for a while now, because I have 3 gram left from that batch. So, was my plan, the next time I would aim for the same procedere just with the left 1,8 gram, which Im not that sure about anymore. When I came back home I thought forth and back but there was a unexpected strong desire to do it. The rhythms seemed fine for that. I think, the forum forced me somehow to do it, too. The last days I especially tried to handle my relationship to the world in another ways and it was refreshing. That means: dont staring at monitors. Instead of that interact with the world like folks did some years ago. I wanted to eat something. So I ate a little bit more carrot and a little bit salad midday. In the early evening I ate a tiny amount of strong cacao chocolate. I used the laptop only a little bit and then disconnected from electricity, put off the internet router. I waited, yes, meditated and stretched until almost 4 a.m., then I finally had ingested the tea. One hour before that I drank more than 300 ml of the 100 % currant juice. Or it was rather so: I wanted to smell the juice first. I first checked how long this can stay fresh. The juice stays fresh approximately 5 days in the fridge. So I just opened the bottle. Then I wanted to nip from the bottle. Then came a sip and another and another. There was still plenty left in the bottle. I thought, I could drink the rest in some days, but finally I had drank it empty slow and steady. The hour didnt felt like waiting, one hour later I had the mushroom tea in front of my nose. I prepared a can of seabuckthorn and let it stood 10 minutes, so that an initial brew temperature of approximately 80°C was there, and then poured over the mushrooms with slightly more than 2 gram citric acid. I had the moment of respect for the 1,2 gram, so I almost only did 0,9. But then I wanted to know what happens, when I do, what I aimed for. The relatively many shriveled mushrooms (because so tiny) gave their taste to the tea for sure and gave it a spicy touch in a good manner. I wanted to combine mushrooms with honey for the first time in my life. So, when the tea cooled down while drinking it, I added less then a half tea spoon to it. This was a tasty drink!
_____First i was standing. Then sitting. Then lying in the relative darkness. It doesnt came promptly. After a while I was thinking of many things in a trippy way. In a filthy/not beautiful way (but not only of course). I wasnt able to lay much time, it was very uncomfortable. I thought of my mattress in a very filthy/not beatiful way. Plus, I layed on my side, and somehow I visualised (in a rather normal way though) my bent spine, and this was uncomfortable, too. So I stood up after a rather short time. One petri dish I had looked up yesterday was so invaded by an unwanted not cube myc, that the mycelial threads with tiny black heads grew out of the edge already. That came to my mind for example and I wanted to know whats going on while tripping, where I am standing in life and what its all about. Of course I have more questions than before. Air and so forth. But I had respect to this lifeform in a positive way, too. What am I doing here? Am I capable of handling life, navigate through it? Whats right and whats not. Top and bottom, where is which direction?
_____The mushroom experience before the 1,6 gram plain tea was in october last year, where I ate 1 gram of the same batch but drank a Peganum harmala tea before ingesting them. I wrote the report in German and gave it no title, but now I choosed a title in other parameters for the first time, not just the ingredients I took, instead of that a thematic title. But the hall of time experience was there in october, too, but in another ways of course. Is anything of importance? Or doesnt it matter what happens? But somehow it matters. Should I just go and go (or walk and walk, dont know how to put it better in english) and see where I will be stranded? What is better, rolling the dice, do what one aims for or not doing anything at all. Well, we are creatures that do things. While I was going for a walk yesterday, I had the desire to pee in the bush, which I do like more than peeing into a toilet. While on the influence of the brew, that popped up again. While I was doing some steps through some gras and flowers, I thought, that it is okay, that I am manifesting this path, like a bear would. I had a feeling of guilt for the plants and potential insects, that I had set food on. Life is blooming like crazy. Someone said, that one just can go into the green, that its our choice what happens. Water. Plastic. Am I doomed to be interwoven with plastic? Will I be able to see any family member or friend again or is it all over and Im stuck into a matrix? Am I following a devilish path? Suffocating. Should I just stand right here and right now, until the end of time somehow, turning into a tree (yes, into a mushroom too, but the tree thing was stronger)? Or lying or whatever. Is everything a dream? Absurd strange anatomy. I looked on my plants in my apartment and the vegetating appeared very doomish. The music from Starbound was playing in my head so very hard and consistently and complex. It was very emotional. At one point I came into a pixel/building world like Starbound for some seconds. But the music was there so penetrating and lasting, even days after the experience. At another point I experienced somewhat debts floating through me in a depleting way (with a small amount of the opposite: refreshing energizing).
_____I had the desire to do things, that are physical impossible, with the sense that I actually cant (fluctuation). I came into a strong fantasy world of parkouring (which what I was actually doing a little bit on railings, which was refreshing for the balance and the physical movement was refreshing, too). I did it when I was younger, but very amateurish. The human body is capable to do astonishing things. Dangerous things, too. Yes, I played with the idea of jumping out of the window from the x-floor to look what happens. Does it matter? Yes, it matters. It has influence in the world. I could be dead right now, but I am living. But somehow, no matter what happens, it goes on and on. I was outside where the sun came out and it was beautiful, although I had the sense, that the twilight was going on almost forever. There were really holy moments. I dont looked on the clock, but it went pretty long, and besides the stress I had the possibility to rest for hours.